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|author=[[Kazan Smedry]]
|world=Earth (Alcatraz)
|books=[[Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians (series)|Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians]]
}}
'''The List''' is a list of reasons why short people are better off than tall people according to [[Kazan Smedry]]. It is not clear if Kaz is serious about The List, but he takes every opportunity to recite from it. [[Australia Smedry]] finds The List ridiculous, as does [[Bastille]].{{book ref|a2|12}} Kazan says that the facts on The List are scientifically researched and time-tested.{{book ref|a2|6}}
'''1.''' Don't argue with the short person. He's always right.{{book ref|a2|12}}
'''15.''' Short people make smaller targets.{{book ref|a2|10}}
'''28.''' Short people can find things easier and follow trails better because they are closer to the ground.{{book ref|a2|6}}
'''47.''' Tall people's heads are in thinner atmosphere, causing oxygen deprivation, which causes their brains to not work as well as short people's.{{book ref|a2|6}}
'''127.''' Short people have smaller bodies, but regular-sized hearts, so their heart-to-flesh ratio is larger, making them more compassionate.{{book ref|a2|8}}
'''236.''' Short people are more humble.{{book ref|a2|12}}
'''257.''' A tall person can shield you from dragon breath.{{book ref|a4|4}}
Unknown number. Short people are better because it takes them longer to walk places, therefore they get more exercise.{{book ref|a2|12}}
== Notes ==
<references />
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{{Alcatraz}}
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